110692466570345552
I got my MRI done last night. It wasn’t so bad. Last time I had one, when I was a kid, I felt really claustrophobic and cried. This time, I nearly fell asleep. I guess it shows your a mom of little kids when you appreciate the MRI for the 25 minutes to just lay down with no one bothering you or talking to you or wanting you to do something. I won’t get the results till probably next week.
I feel like a total loser today. I really felt like it a lot worse last night. The reason is so stupid, but I hate feeling so bad about myself. The reason is mostly because my house is a mess. I was doing good until we got sick with the virus, and, between us all being sick with that, the kids getting sinusitis and colds and being whiny and clingy, revival, and Chris working, I can’t get on top of it again. Everytime I jump in to get something done, the baby starts crying, and I have to see to him. I clean the living room up in the morning, and two hours later they’ve got it a total wreck again. I feel like such a loser. I wonder why so much of my self-worth is tied up into whether my house is clean or not. Is it because it’s my job? I don’t know. I’m not a neat person, by nature. I’ve always been a little messy. So it’s harder for me to be clean than some people I know, who are just natural neat freaks. I’m such a loser. Ugh.
And you are one of the finest people I’ve been blessed to ‘know’. 